Something I want to share regarding the pain of losing Michael

Hello to MJ's Fan~mily. As I'm sure there are a lot of us who are still sad and hurting with the loss of this magnificent man so full of love. I'm hoping that what I am going to tell/ask of you next will help lessen the hurt as it did with me.

I watched a program on CNN Anderson Cooper 360 called Heaven and Back on Saturday December 7 evening 8pm central time. The first woman's story is the one that really helped me. Here is a brief summary...she was kayaking, went over the falls and the kayak got stuck between 2 rocks with her under the water. No one could see her and after 15 minutes there was a "rumble" and a rock appeared from nowhere that hadn't been there before. Then she felt Jesus pick her up...she could see her friends finding the kayak and picking her out of the boat even though she found herself facing a group of people (she said they had bodies like ours but were so white, bright and beautiful) and they put their arms around her and they all started to dance while walking down a hall. She had never seen anything so vibrant, colorful, filled with love everywhere. She had never felt such unconditional love. She then was taken down a hall and she saw God and was told that she had to go back it was not her time yet, she was still needed on earth. She was led to an edge where she could see her body lying below and she said that she didn't want to go back even though she loved her husband of 27 yrs (I think) and adored her 4 children and her life. She was an orthopedic surgeon. But she had to go back. You can watch the ending as I want to share my feelings on how I see this concerned my sadness about Michael. We know how tortured he was pretty much all of his life when all he wanted was to be loved. He loved his fans and knew that we/they loved him but he wanted love in his personal life. When DR gave him 2 children and then Blanket came along MJ was so happy and filled with love. He raised those children to be wonderful human beings. But he still needed to be the perfectionist and entertain...which at times kept him from the children...and allowed enablers closer to him driving him to the paranoia stages. When I watched the program I thought of Michael receiving all of that love upon reaching "Heaven" and like the lady who loved her life and family so much, he did not want to come back. He knew his children had been raised well and he knew that they would be looked after. The program just seemed to lessen my hurt a tiny bit that he was gone because he is covered and surrounded by so much unconditional love all that he had ever wanted all of his life. I hope that I have not offended anyone by my thoughts. Believe me I would love to have MJ here...I just would want him to be happy and feel loved.

Thank you for this lovely message Ploppy. While reading tears came to my eyes. I will always cry for Michael, partly because It's heartbreaking because he is gone, the other part is because I truly love him so much. In sad times when I ask why? I think of what Stevie Wonder said at MJ's Memorial. Stevie said something like. he said loosely: " As much as we need Michael (Jackson) God must have needed him more. Now I have your message to think on in my sad moments. Ploppy, Thank you for sharing the love. I am not offended at all, your words are just another way to cope with such a great loss of a great human being. Much love (hugs)